In Vino Veritas
by PyroKid
Summary: HumorFic, Fin. (Forgot to change status) A game of Truth or Dare, a bottle, a dark closet, a large supply of drinks, and (of course) drunken words. 04.08.04 - Please read postscript.
1. Ensnared

Disclaimer - I own no characters.  
In Vino Veritas  
PyroKid  
04.07.04  
  
"The Calvin cycle!" Ai muttered disgustedly. "Of all the topics to cover, she gave us the Dark Cycle to research!"

"It's not like we were even doing anything wrong; we talk every day in class." Conan added.

"That's why we've amassed a collection of 58 extracurricular papers and essays to turn in at the end of school in the three months we've been in school." Ai reminded him.

"Are you sure-" Conan began.

"I've told you ten times, Shinichi... if the topic was the Krebs cycle, we'd be done. We wouldn't even have to leave the lab. But this is the Calvin cycle, and I have no interest in plants."

16-year-old Conan Edogawa and Ai Haibara had chosen a dark corner of the library to research their 59th paper, preferring not to be seen doing something as embarrassing as researching. The Detective Boys had split up years ago, when Conan and Ai began taking higher level classes, and Conan and Ai were the inseparable pair that always managed to irritate the living hell out of every single teacher in Japan with their inattentiveness yet perfect scores. The rest of the DB had failed their general courses, and hit the road for technical school. Ayumi was training to be a recruit for the police force (Conan scoffed upon hearing), Mitsushiko was studying under an auto mechanic (Ai wordlessly raised an eyebrow), and Genta wanted to become a chef (neither commented).

Suddenly, their papers fluttered and they head the library door slam violently into the wall.

"What the **hell** is up with that idiot?" A voice complained angrily. "He said I didn't align the tires, change the oil, or check the tires' air pressure properly. So he gave me **_another_** F!"

"What an insufferable hypocrite!" a second male voice joined in. The voices became louder as the speakers rounded the corner and sat at the table next to Ai and Conan without noticing them.

"Sounds like he doesn't know what he's doing himself- he" the female voice was cut off by an angry swear.

"I can't afford this right now. I can't take **another** F!" the first voice whined bitterly before unleashing a torrent of curses. The other two joined in promptly.

Angrily, Ai spun around. "Will you guys shut up? It's your own incompetence that-"

"Mind your own business and f-- Haibara?"

Conan turned around as well, and was surprised to see the Detective Boys sitting at the adjacent table.

"Sorry... we were just discussing Mitsushiko's pathetic excuse for a teacher. I..." Ayumi trailed off when she noticed Conan and Ai staring at her. Of course, they were mentally challenging her right to call _anyone_ pathetic.

"Yes! I've found them!" Genta yelled triumphantly.

Ayumi and Mitsushiko turned and immediately began clapping Genta on the back.

"Let's go!" Genta exclaimed, holding the comic books above his head in triumph.

"Hey, Wait!" Ayumi called out. "Let's see if Haibara and Conan want to come. I mean, ever since we got into different schools, we haven't seen them much at all." Without waiting for the others' input, she turned to Conan and Haibara. "Conan, Haibara, you want to come hang out with us? It'll be so fun! Ever since you guys started taking all of the advanced classes, we've had no classes together, and now that we're in different schools..."

Conan plastered what he hoped was a regretful look on his face as he shook his head. "We'd really like to," _Yeah, right,_ "But our teacher has assigned an-" _Wait, to admit that we have to do research for _anything_ is way too embarrassing..._ "That is, uh..." he looked at Ai, and could tell she was thinking the same.

"Come on, screw school! What fun is there in books and papers?" Genta chimed in. "I mean, seriously..."

"Fine, fine." Conan agreed reluctantly.

"All right!" The Detective Boys exclaimed joyously as they turned and lead the reluctant pair out of the library.

"Mitsushiko, it's your turn to host." Ayumi declared, turning and heading in the direction of the Tsuburaya house. They entered and took the stairs to Mitsushiko's bedroom, where Ayumi asked everyone to sit in a circle.

"My parents are out at the lab doing an experiment, as usual, so they won't be back until 1:00 AM at the earliest. Come on." Opening his closet, Mitsushiko tapped a part of the wall. "Genta, Ayumi, and I made this compartment together... we all have one!" he informed Conan and Ai, reaching inside and bringing out a crate of drinks. He reached in again, felt around, and set a tray of shot glasses on the tatami mat. Conan and Ai exchanged a glance.

"This is our new game we've made up, since we're already 16 and everything." Ayumi piped up happily. "It's like Truth or Dare, but you don't have to meet the dare or answer the question if you think it encroaches private grounds. Instead, you have to take a shot. You also have to take a shot if you're caught cheating, and you can't take two in a row unless it's for punishment. You spin a bottle to see who's questioned, so it's all based on chance. Once you're drunk, we don't hold back."

"Yeah, that's right!" Mitsushiko added. "Once when Genta was drunk, we learned that he used to run around with underwear on his head, his mom's skirt as a cape, and a bra pretending to be Superwoman. ...And then we persuaded him to do it in his drunken stupor!"

They all laughed, even Genta.

"Uh, but we... we-" Conan began.

"What he means to say," Ai interrupted, "is that we don't want to play."

"But... you've been passed a shot glass." Genta pointed out.

"More importantly, you've accepted a shot glass. That's the initiating gesture, which begins the game. The game doesn't end until we're all drunk, or you pass out, and you can't leave the room until then."

_Huh. Let's see _them_ try to get _me_ drunk, _Ai thought contemptuously."Fine, I'm in."

"I... okay." Seeing that he had no other choice, Conan decided to humor the kids and wait for the perfect opportunity to sneak out.

Mitsushiko brought out one last item before shutting the compartment, and placed it in the middle of the circle.

"I'll start us off!" Ayumi volunteered, spinning the bottle.

Mitsushiko grinned as the bottle came to a stop, pointing at him.

"Truth or dare?" Ayumi asked.

"Truth." he replied without hesitation.

"How old are you?" Ayumi asked.

Inwardly, Conan sighed. _Wow, and I thought these brats were out for my blood or something. This will be an extremely boring game, but at least it'll be safe._

"16, of course." Mitsushiko answered, spinning the bottle. "Conan, truth or dare?"

_I can take a dare, no problem, _Conan thought confidently."Dare."

"I dare you to call the girl you like and confess to her right now, in front of us." Mitsushiko winked at Ayumi and Genta.

Conan turned red. "I... I... uh,"

"Hey, dude... don't tell me it's not a girl." Mitsushiko interrupted.

"Of course it is!" Conan glared at the Detective Boys, who hadn't bothered to hold back their laughter. He turned to look out the window, avoiding their stares. "It's just that... I..." Suddenly, he leapt to his feet and bolted madly for the door. The Detective Boys jumped up, and stepped into their obviously well-practiced roles: Genta floored Conan with a flying tackle, and Mitsushiko stood beside Ayumi, leaning against the door.

_Hell, they _weren't _joking when they said they'd protect the rules with their lives._ Conan thought disappointedly, accepting the phone Mitsushiko handed him. Punching in the number to the Kudo residence, he waited until the second ring to begin speaking. "Hello, may I speak to Kaida? Oh. Hi... I've always liked you; maybe we could go out someday, say Saturday at 2:00?" Conan said smoothly.

Ai held back her laughter and managed to keep a straight face, but Mitsushiko narrowed his eyes.

"Turn on speakerphone." he demanded, lunging for the phone. Grabbing it, he pressed the 'speakerphone' button, and the sound of Shinichi Kudo's answering machine flooded the room: "-udo, I'm not available at the moment. If you're a current client calling about a case, please press one, and the call will be forwarded to my cell phone. If-" Mitsushiko disconnected the phone.

"Trying to cheat?" Genta demanded, inwardly pleased with himself for having caught on (relatively) quickly. "Rules say that's a shot." he passed Conan a shot of Jägermeister.

_Idiots, at least mix it into something good,_ Conan thought, downing it with no problem.

"Make the call." Mitsushiko held the phone out again.

"I just drank!"

"That was punishment for trying to dupe us," Ayumi spoke up.

"Fine. Pass me another." Conan reached out.

"Sorry. Rules say you can't drink twice in a row, unless it's to meet the punishment." Mitsushiko offered the phone once again.

Conan grit his teeth, glared at the phone as if in hopes of blowing it up, but accepted the phone. Haltingly, he punched in a long string of numbers, and awaited the ring, but a loud clap of thunder sounded, and the phone went dead.

"Fine, you were lucky that time. But once the electricity comes back, you're making that call. Truth or dare?" Mitsushiko asked again.

"Truth," Conan answered, unwilling to risk his neck for another dare.

"Tell us about the girl you were going to call." Mitsushiko demanded with a malevolent glint in his eyes.

"Uh, she... she's really quiet, but when she does speak, it's almost always in the form of sarcastic or derogatory comments. But that's only because she's so much smarter than everyone else around her." (At this point, Ayumi swayed on the spot, thinking Conan was referring to her.) "She used to be distant towards me as well, but we've become better friends since then. "Her brilliance could rival Athena's, and her beauty is a threat to Aphrodite's reputation." (The Detective Boys stared blankly, the allusions clearly lost on them.) "She-"

"Okay, okay... that's enough; shut up." Mitsushiko interrupted.

Face burning, Conan tapped the bottle, which pointed to Genta. He picked truth.

"Genta, what's your favorite book?" Conan asked, clearly wishing to end the game as soon as possible.

"This one!" Genta exclaimed, picking up a nearby comic book from the pile they'd taken from the library before spinning the bottle. "_The Ad-ven-tures of Mas-ked Yaiba." _Genta read haltingly, then threw it carelessly over his shoulder, exclaiming, "the pictures are great!" Mitsushiko and Ayumi wore expressions of agreement on their faces while Conan and Ai exchanged glances of disgust and contempt.

"Ayumi, truth or dare?"

"Dare." Ayumi replied, unfazed.

"I dare you to count to five." Genta came up with one of the crappiest dares Conan had ever heard.

After complying, Ayumi gave the bottle a spin, and it landed on Ai.

"Truth or dare?" _Truth... pick truth!_ Ayumi prayed silently, still fearing that Ai liked Conan.

"Dare."

_Damn. Fine... _"I _dare_ you to tell the name of the person you like."

_What the hell? What kind of dare is that? Why is the manipulative sneak so concerned with whether I like Shinichi or not? _Reaching out, Haibara grabbed a shot glass and swallowed the contents in a single gulp. The Detective Boys stared. They had always been so far behind Conan and Ai in every single imaginable subject, and had finally found one thing they were sure they could beat the pair at: drinking. They reasoned that since Conan and Ai were perfect little children they would have no experience with alcoholic drinks, and thus lose miserably and find themselves subject to the DB's questionings.

The game continued:

"Genta, what's your favorite subject?"

"Uh... recess? Wait, we don't have that anymore. Lunch!"

"Mitsushiko, I dare you to jump up and down."

"Ayumi, what's your last name?"

"Yoshida. Conan, what's the name of-"

Mitsushiko interrupted Ayumi's question with a tap. "Hey, guess what? Electricity's back."


	2. 'Intoxicated'

Disclaimer - I own no characters.

ghdsjkalhfslkahfsaklhkla - Yeah... I really can't justify my hate for the DB... I guess it's 'cause they're so annoying.  
Nakoudo - I would, but I'm trying to make the DB as stupid as possible. Plus, they're 'teaming up' against Conan and Ai, so they ask each other retarded questions and give bland dares.  
mysteriousangelgirl - It's really cool how you read my SxS stories... thanks!  
Katana-Jake - Thanks! (Here's your update!)  
Me - ::grins:: Thanks for the reviews and support (esp. for Contra Sententias!)

A/N: This chapter has a pretty bad ending since I have a roaring, pounding, insanity-inducing headache right now (staring at the screen probably isn't the best thing to do right now. Linkin Park doesn't help, either.) The last part of the chapter was the result of wandering into the realm of LoTR, HP, and Chinese DC fics. Since I was working on The Quandary as well, Chapter 9 will probably end up a huge(r) sapfest. That's so not me; lack of sleep, sugar, and caffeine make you do crazy things.

In Vino Veritas  
PyroKid  
13.07.04 (started)

Mitsushiko interrupted Ayumi's question with a tap. "Hey, guess what? Electricity's back." He pressed the speakerphone button before handing the phone to Conan, who reluctantly dialed a fairly long string of numbers. A ringing sounded from within the room, and Ayumi's hand flew to her cell phone eagerly. She brought it out and pressed the 'talk' button, putting the phone to her ear, but heard nothing. Confused, she looked around as the ringing continued.

Ai had been staring outside the window in a bored mood, wishing for the game to end, but was jolted back to reality as her cell phone began to ring. Slowly, she reached into her pocket and looked at the screen, which read 'Tsuburaya Household'. Eyes wide in shock, she stared at Conan, phone still in her grip. Conan couldn't hold back a smile at the confused and innocent look on her face as she stared at him questioningly. He motioned for her to answer her phone. Slowly, without breaking eye contact, she pressed the talk button and held the phone to her ear.

"Hey, Ai. I... I like you. I've never said anything because, well, we live together, and it'd be kind of weird if we dated at the same time. You want to go out sometime?"

"I'd like that." Haibara replied, still searching the depths of his eyes, trying to determine whether this was another attempt to placate the Detective Boys.

"So, uh... I'll talk to you later?" A nod was the only answer he received.

The game continued:

"Ayumi, what's your favorite hobby?"

"Training to be a part of the police force." Ayumi clearly misunderstood the meaning of the complex word 'hobby'.

"Haibara, do you like Conan?"

Ai's face remained impassive. "Pass me a shot."

"You drank last time," Ayumi pointed out gleefully.

"Does it even matter? Doesn't her avoidance of the question answer it anyways?" Mitsushiko pointed out.

_I have a bad feeling about this stupid rule... _"Fine, I do."

The Detective Boys turned to each other in a huddle.

"Huh... they're just pretending to like each other to avoid giving us the real names... it's all preplanned!"

"You know," Mitsushiko began, turning back to Conan and Ai. "Since you guys are just lying, a pointer for the future: unrequited love is much more realistic and believable." he finished before turning back to Genta and Ayumi.

"There's no way to prove that they're not telling the truth, so we can't punish them by making them drink... I know! Let's dare them to do stuff you really wouldn't want to do to anyone unless you like them." Ayumi declared, intent on punishing Conan for trying to hide his feelings for her.

"Haha... that really sucks to be them, then. Y'know, since we're all gaining up on them," he elaborated, seeing the confused look on Genta's face.

"Genta, I dare you to fast for one day," Ai announced after the huddle. _They're clearly trying to give us a hard time... might as well put out some interesting questions and dares._

"Mitsushiko, what was the first drink you had?" Genta asked after he had calmed down over his dare.

"It was a beer. Conan, go sit with Haibara and hold her hand."

"I can't just grab her hand without permission... just in case you haven't noticed, it's a two-person thing." Conan complained, refusing to complete the dare.

Mitsushiko sighed and passed him another shot, but was inwardly pleased; if Conan refused to do even this, there were some interesting things in store for him.

"What's your greatest fear?" Conan asked Ayumi after drinking the shot. _Tell us... and I'll find some way to use that against you, you conniving little weasel._

"Rejection." Ayumi said brusquely. "Haibara, I dare you to go sit in Conan's lap."

"You know I'm not going to." Ai sent Ayumi a withering look; she was sick of the Detective Boys and their retarded games. "Conan, what's 3 cubed?" she asked after drinking the shot.

"27. Mitsushiko, tell us who you like." Conan said after spinning the bottle.

"Um... I... uh..." Mitsushiko stuttered uncertainly. "G-Genta, what's 2 plus 1?" Mitsushiko managed to cough out after downing his shot.

"I... uh... That's not fair! We're on a team! You can't ask me hard questions like that! I mean... that's against the rules!" Genta complained as Ayumi passed him a shot.

_ Wow, this is some retarded kid, _Ai thought to herself contemptuously, aware that Conan was probably thinking the exact same. _Enjoy your drink._

"Conan, go kiss Haibara." he burst out gleefully after spinning the bottle and hearing Conan's response.

Conan turned red as he looked at Ai. _Damn it, **why** did I drink last round? _He mentally cursed himself before rising reluctantly and approaching the red haired girl. "Sorry," he muttered before taking her hand and pressing it to his lips. _Damn that stupid fat Genta! I'll... _Conan's mood lifted when he heard Mitsushiko pick dare, and his face lit up. "Mitsushiko, get on one knee and propose to Genta," he dared in an eerily calm voice that somehow managed to convey his anger, radiating an aura of iciness mixed with a hint of smug satisfaction. _Mess with me and you'll be sorry, you slimy little brats._

"I... what? NO! That's sick. Conan Edogawa, what the-why-you..." Mitsushiko spluttered in rage. "Stop acting like an immature kid and-"

"It's not like any of this requires physical contact of any sort. You drank last time. Do it." Conan replied coldly.

Grudgingly, Mitsushiko rose and approached Genta. Five feet away, he knelt and muttered, "Gentawillyoumarryme." It was more like a statement, and definitely had the 'I'm just doing this because I'm being forced to' sound to it.

"Uh, ok," Genta answered stupidly. "But only if you'll make a different eel dish for me every day."

"You idiot, that was only because of the dare," Mitsushiko hissed in disgust before spinning the bottle. "Ayumi, truth or dare? Who do you hate the most?" he asked, without waiting for Ayumi's answer.

"Uh... my math teacher. She keeps on giving me F's and saying that 2 times 1 isn't 5," Ayumi answered after a moment of thinking. "Conan, I dare you to drink five shots."

"Mitsushiko, whuat's yurr daaarkest secret?" Conan slurred after completing his dare and finally managing to spin the bottle successfully.

_Great... that means I can decide which one of the 'darkest' to tell._ "I... I smoked some MJ a few times," he spun the bottle and looked up. "Haibara, go snog Conan," he dared.

Ai spun to face him, fury raging in the depths of her eyes. "That's unsanitary. I refuse."

"Sorry, you drank last time." Mitsushiko pointed out, savoring his revenge on Conan, which was just part of his twisted thinking, since he was the one who provoked Conan and Ai first.

Managing to keep her face calm, Ai stood and deliberately walked towards the door, ignoring the movements of the Detective Boys to block her path. "Don't make me hurt you for the sake of a game," she warned, the turbulent sea of her eyes roaring.

Knowing they stood no chance against Ai in a fair fight, Ayumi shaped her face into a stricken expression, and called out, "Conan... Conan, what's wrong? Are you okay?"

Without giving it another thought, Haibara turned to look at Conan. In the same instant, all three Detective Boys rushed her. Spinning back around, Ai swung her leg out in a sweep, tripping Ayumi, flipping Mitsushiko as she stood, and throwing a punch to Genta. Unfortunately, Genta just absorbed the punch as if he hadn't felt it, and grabbed Ai, throwing her into the closet. Just as she sat up from the undignified position of being sprawled on the closet floor, Conan came flying in.

"You smell nice," Conan said, giggling.

Ai raised an eyebrow. _A drunken Kudo is rather interesting. _"Really," she commented, regarding the drunken boy before her. For the first time, she paused to consider their positions, and was horrified to realize that Conan was actually sprawled over her. _What the-_ she unleashed a torrent of curses, mostly directed towards the Detective Boys. In the end, she actually spoke some out loud, screaming past the physical barrier of the wooden door to ensure that they were aware of her displeasure. "Kudo, get the hell off me!" she continued in a lower voice, pushing Conan away.

"Why? Don't you like sitting beside me?" Conan asked.

"'Beside'? 'Beside' is fine. I do have a problem with 'under', though. We're stuck together in a dark closet, you're half-drunk, Shinichi. I don't want to... accidentally brush anything."

If the light was on, or Conan was actually sober, he would have been able to detect a trace of embarrassment in Haibara's voice.

"But... I... I can't move. It's too cramped."

_What the hell? This damn closet is like a bloody death trap! _"Don't move, then."

Conan struggled to sit upright.

"Hey, watch the hands, okay?" Ai said, resigning to the fact that Conan was _not_ going to sit still and 'not move'.

"Relax. I'm just trying to sit up. But hey, you know, if you hold my hands, they won't _accidentally_ touch...anything."

"Shinichi, you are the most disturbed and suggestive drunk I've ever met. ...aside from myself, of course, but it's a piece of work to get me drunk." Ai would not normally tell anyone these things, but a drunk retains memories like a sieve holds water. She took hold of his hands anyways, to prevent unwanted future physical contact.

Grinning, Conan sat up, but didn't loosen his grip on Ai's hands and instead began rubbing his thumb across the back of her hand.

Ai let out a startled gasp. "Shinichi..." she began uncertainly.

"Shh..." Conan interrupted, putting his fingers over her lips. "Don't speak." He moved his hand up, tracing her cheek and slipping his fingers into the silken strands of her strawberry-blond hair. "Ai... Ai," he murmured, "I lied. I lied to you earlier. I don't like you. I love you."

Reflecting back on the moment, Conan had no idea what prompted his next move; maybe it was the confusion surfaced in her eyes that tore away the cold mask she donned, or maybe it was the fact that he had breached the unscalable walls she had built around herself to see the unconfident, vulnerable Ai Haibara. He leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers. Shocked, Ai parted her lips to question him, but froze when Conan's tongue slipped into her mouth. Indescribable warmth flooded her senses, washing away all reason and leaving her breathless. Slowly, the tension drifted away and she relaxed as she began drinking in his intoxicating taste, drowning in it, losing herself. Conan slipped an arm around her waist, pulling her closer, but she pushed away gently, stepping back until she felt the wall of the closet against her back.

"Wait... There's something I've kept bottled up inside of me for so long that I'll explode if I don't tell you, but I've never gotten around to it. Since you're not going to remember any of this, I guess this would be the ideal time to tell you... The first time I set eyes on you, a warm, fuzzy feeling enveloped my system, and has only intensified since then; when I spoke to you and became familiar with your personality, I found your intelligence mesmerizing, your sarcasm a source of endless amusement, your stubborn sense of righteousness admirable, and your soccer skills breathtaking. Then there was the fact that you just seem to glow with this reassuring aura that enfolds me, making everything seem better whether it's a brush with Death or just a bad day. I mean - what-what I'm trying to say is that I... I just... I..." For the first time, Ai found herself unable to express herself; her mouth was parched, throat scratchy, her breathing became shallow, pulse quickened. She became flustered, probably due to Conan's sudden and extreme proximity. "I-I love you," she blurted out. "I really do, but you're, uh... you're drunk, and probably have no idea what you just said, what you just did, what you're... what you're doing," she faltered, looking up curiously as Conan placed his hands on her shoulders. "and I don't-" she was cut off as Conan leaned down and covered her mouth with his. A surge of emotions coursed through her: shock, indignation, embarrassment, and sadness, but a sense of ecstasy crashed through the dam of reason, pouring into the networks of her mind, body, and soul, compelling her, forcing her not to push away. A while later, a thought streaked through the clouded mists fogging her mind, breaking the trance and allowing a ray of reason to stream into her mind. _Shinichi... doesn't taste drunk. At all.  
_

A/N: From the reviews, I've gathered that some people understand what I tried to do with the ending line. Like Memento Mori, this ends on a note of humor because Conan/Shinichi isn't really drunk, but the entire fic up 'til the last line makes you think he is.


End file.
